No Relief

Today, there is no relief from missing her.

It’s a constant ache in my chest.  A constant thought swirling around my brain: I miss her.

I’ve realized that Fridays are starting to be difficult for me.  I’m so tired from the work week that I can’t stave off the emotions – whatever they may be.  Guilt.  Anger.  Sadness.

They’re always there.  These emotions.  Just like a predator, silently lurking in the shadows…waiting for the opportune moment to pounce on me.  A moment of vulnerability, weakness.  Even if there’s just the tiniest chink in my armor, they can sense it.  And then, I’m pretty frickin’ easy prey.  I will crumble to the ground as they eat me whole or torn in pieces.

So, today, when I’m borderline exhausted…just one wrong step (literally – even stubbing my toe would do it at this point), wrong word, wrong anything…and they’re going to pounce.