Today, there is no relief from missing her.
It’s a constant ache in my chest. A constant thought swirling around my brain: I miss her.
I’ve realized that Fridays are starting to be difficult for me. I’m so tired from the work week that I can’t stave off the emotions – whatever they may be. Guilt. Anger. Sadness.
They’re always there. These emotions. Just like a predator, silently lurking in the shadows…waiting for the opportune moment to pounce on me. A moment of vulnerability, weakness. Even if there’s just the tiniest chink in my armor, they can sense it. And then, I’m pretty frickin’ easy prey. I will crumble to the ground as they eat me whole or torn in pieces.
So, today, when I’m borderline exhausted…just one wrong step (literally – even stubbing my toe would do it at this point), wrong word, wrong anything…and they’re going to pounce.